He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I wish i was in the wii world.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize