i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
you traded sex for a burrito?
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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