he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
