It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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