Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
