I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Let's get the cat blown out
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
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