Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
