I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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