Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i barfeds in our rink
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
