im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
