Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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