Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
