we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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