If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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