New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
