i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
