I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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