He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize