yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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