Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
