btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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