im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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