Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
