I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
