Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Randomize
