Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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