id be glad to
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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