i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
