Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
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