I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
