Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
