i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
time to smoke my breakfast
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
