have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
