Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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