allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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