i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
