seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
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