You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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