Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
