So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
accomplished twins. life is a go
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
