Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
