Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
