Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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