I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
