you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
