I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
