wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
