TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
did you just send me my own nude
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
