so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
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