The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
